Pitch Wars Advice Blog Hop

For those of you who are about to be selected for Pitch Wars – and for those of you who are not – I see REVISIONS in your future!

Revising is something all writers do, whether it's your first book or your hundredth. "How do I make my book better?" can be a maddening question and there aren't always easy answers. However, there are common things that you can look for as you approach the next draft of your novel. I'm in the process of developing a workshop to help writers identify issues that many of us encounter, and these fall under two headings – Strengthening the Story, and Perfecting the Writing.

From Sept. 2017: ready with the red pencil

The biggest "big picture" concerns are bigger than what I'm going to address here, things like plot, character arcs, a story-worthy problem, a concept with zing, etc. You can read about those in any number of craft books. Rather, I want to address the sort of details that you can train yourself to become aware of. Many of these, if left unresolved, will earn you a plethora of "bubble comments" from critique partners, beta readers, or even editors.

STRENGTHENING THE STORY:

1) Not enough tension. Tension is necessary in all genres. Tension keeps the reader on edge and involved. To achieve tension in your writing you need to make sure that various things, on various levels, are unresolved. New questions need to be continually introduced: "What's going to happen if________?", "Why did she react like that?", "Oooh, what's that little teaser referring to?" Tension also exists when characters disagree with each other. In short, tension is a byproduct of conflict, and you want to have multiple layers of active conflict present throughout your novel. Regardless of what type of story you write, tension can increase the likelihood that your readers keep turning the page.

2) Have you left all the good stuff in your head? You know where your scene is taking place and what it looks like. Do your readers know? You see how your characters react to situations, and know the backstory that makes them act that way. Have you let the readers in on that? There's an element to this that's about description (places, people, objects, weather, etc.) – which needn't be long to be effective – but a bigger element is about world and character building. If you want readers to SEE and KNOW what you see and know, you need to show them.

3) Write "in scene" whenever possible. Sometimes a bit of summary is useful, but don't use it to avoid writing difficult or otherwise more interesting "in scene" chapters. Where summary tends to be passive, writing "in scene" is active. Where summary is telling, writing "in scene" is showing.

PERFECTING THE WRITING:

1) Consider dialogue:

- Where is it too explanatory?

          

- Are there exchanges that could be a little shorter? (i.e. conversation that doesn't contribute to the story or characters)

          

- Are there exchanges that could be a little longer? (People can be kind of roundabout in conversations; the novelist needs to find a good balance.)

          

- Are there certain words that only a certain character uses?

          

- Look for places where you can replace "she said" with more meaningful action or internalization: 

a) "I don't know," she said. Vs:

b) "I don't know." Mary scratched her nose, determined not to look Wade in the eye. He probably already knew she was lying, but she'd made a promise to her sister.

2) Consider individual words:

- Look for stronger verbs

          

- Look for more accurate/expressive words of all kinds

          

- Look for overused words, both common and "weird" (In Word, use "Find")

          

- Look for words that are repeated too close together (in the same sentence or paragraph)

3) Check punctuation. Watch for overuse/underuse of commas, semi-colons, colons, and em dashes. Use exclamation points rarely!

4) Make sure every sentence reads JUST as you want it: **

- If it's awkward – or when in doubt – FIX it!

          

- Find yourself yawning while reading your own book? Tighten in places that feel like they're dragging.

          

- Keep an eye on she/her (and he/his) in places with multiple people = make sure it's clear who the "she" and "her" are referring to.

** Note: this can be easier to assess when you have "fresh eyes." Try to take some time off between drafts – weeks, or even months!

It might take some practice, but over time you can become conscious of these kinds of nuances and really take your work to the next level.

Happy writing… and revising!

Would I Read This?

What I Learned About My Writing by Dissecting My Reading Choices

After writing four Young Adult novels (three of them speculative fiction) I decided to switch gears. I took a long, hard look at what I like to read – and how I go about choosing what to read. It suddenly seemed incredibly obvious that what I write should pass a simple first test: would I read this? When I asked that of my first four books the answer was a little shocking: probably not. Don't get me wrong, I read both YA and speculative fiction – plus a lot of other things. But if I'd picked up my own books in a library or bookstore, based on the description and concept it's pretty iffy whether I would have taken any of them home.

I learned something very important from this: I am very judgmental about what I read. And in a world where people have busy lives and endless distractions, most readers are probably fairly picky about what they commit to. So that's when I started analyzing my own decision-making process: I work in a library and can bring home anything I want, for free. But I don't. So what am I looking for?

Not only do I judge a book by its cover, I judge it first by its spine. In the library where I work, New Fiction and New Non-fiction have their own displays, but the covers don't face outward like they do in some libraries and bookstores. I realized I make silent evaluations about the spine before I even pick up a book to find out more about it. Especially in fiction, the spine reveals a lot of information – from how long it is to how famous the author is (based on font size). I am apparently adverse to both super thick books, and books that scream "Huge Commercial Success!" That's just me.

The books on my reading table.

After I approve of the relative size of the book and the style of its spine, I pick it up and look at the cover. Too girly, I put it back. Too masculine, I put it back. An interesting image intrigues me, and maybe a title that makes me say "What's that about?" Then I open the cover and read the jacket copy. My attention span is mercilessly short. Maybe it's the setting I don't like. Maybe it's the main character's occupation. My ability to say "no" is brutal. I am more biased than I ever realized. So what am I attracted to?

Sometimes it's one word – the setting or the concept. Sometimes it’s a few sentences that make me go, "Hmm, I'd like to see what happens." Sometimes, to further convince me that I've made a good selection, I read the blurbs. I prefer blurbs from reviews (as a former filmmaker I know how hard it is to get press coverage, so I appreciate that as a general accomplishment). Alternately, I like blurbs from writers whose work I know, but even if I'm unfamiliar with the blurbists, several dazzling comments can make me even more excited about reading something.

The next thing I usually do is open the book and read a bit of the first page. It's not a deal breaker, I just want to know if there is an immediate connection. Sometimes there is, sometimes there isn't. Again, it's not a deal breaker because I know you often need a few paragraphs, a few pages, to feel like you're involved. Admittedly, as I've gotten older, I've become less inclined to give books a hundred or more pages to spark something in me… But that's a different blog.

There are exceptions to this scrutiny of course. If "everyone's talking about it!" I might read a book regardless of if I find the description inherently interesting. This was true for both "The Goldfinch" by Donna Tartt and "Dead Wake" by Erik Larson and I read both of them quickly and with pleasure. I'll read things based on a New York Times review if it's gotten glowing praise, or by a friend who gushes while recommending something. And obviously I'll read almost anything by favorite authors.

The challenge here was to dissect my own process for choosing a book unknown to me, with the intention of then writing a book that, based on the description and concept, was without a doubt something I would eagerly tuck under my arm and take home. With that in mind, I recently finished my first book for adult readers. (The words "artificial lifeform" will be on the dust jacket!) The enthusiasm and intention I had for this book from the beginning were very different from how and what I'd written before. It makes perfect sense that I should be the ideal reader for my own work. Especially given the precariousness of making an actual career in publishing… but that, too, is another blog.

For now, I've come to understand something important about myself both as a reader and a writer, and the very act of being able to be more intentional with my work is itself a victory.